Sunday, March 28, 2010

Here is another that is funny and shared with me.



If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea....does that mean that one out of five enjoys it?

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?

If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP? ?

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use. Toothpicks?

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?

Is it true that you never really learn to swear until you learn to drive?

As income tax time approaches, did you ever notice: When you put the two words 'The' and 'IRS' together, it spells 'THEIRS'?

YOU, make it a great day!Lord, please keep Your arm around my shoulders and Your hand over my mouth. Amen
Love,
Sara McMurdie

Something that a friend shared with me.

LOVE MY JOB

If you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are in a coma! This is even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have a bad day at work think of this guy..

Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana . He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 FM in Ft. Wayne , Indiana , who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.

Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.

As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool.So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature..It then pumps it down to the diver through agarden hose, which is taped to the air hose.
Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints.What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water.. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch.. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. With in a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.

The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it.. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.


When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.

I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.

When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber.
The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.'Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!Pass this on to all your friends, just in case they're having a bad day!!!

Love,

Sara McMurdie

Thursday, March 25, 2010

It has been a while

Well, it has been a while since I have posted a blog. For starters, I haven't had the inspiration to do much on my blog, mainly noone has care to answer back on it or have not made a comment on the blog. Another reason, I have not been feeling to good to do much of anything. I started off with a bad ear infection, than I had the stomach flu, than a cold started developing and than I started getting the regular flu. March is not a very good month for me. Well, I am back on to writing in my blog and this time I thought maybe I would ask my facebook friends to read now and my past postings of my blog. I will try to let everyone know in advance on my facebook page when I posted a blog. That way whether or not you make comments back, it at least gives everyone a chance to read my blog.

Another reason, is that it is almost here. For those who know me, I also celebrate the Jewish holidays as well as the Christian holidays. Passover is coming up on March 30th, 2010, but technically it will start at sundown March 29th, 2010 and end at sundown April 5th, 2010. Also, Easter is approaching us, which is on April 4th, 2010. So, I will try to do some writings about Easter and Passover as much as possible. I don't know if it will be everyday for a while, but I will do my best.

So, as I mention before I will let all of my friends know when I did some postings to my blog.

Love,
Sara M. M.